Latest Tweet
  • People wouldn't believe the number of things that I've worked on for weeks and have never released because it doesn't feel quite right...

Latest Instagram
Latest Flickr Photos
On This Day
  • No posts

Gun. Bullet. Clay Disc. POW!!

Gun in Hand, Ears Open

Recently a friend and I went to a skeet shooting range because we wanted a safe, real-life alternative to the Nintendo NES game Duck Hunt. As soon as I arrived on the property I knew that things were serious because everyone was walking around with a gun in their hand. I stepped out of the car very carefully and tried not to make any sharp movements or loud noises because I didn’t want to excite the gun-toters and end up as a potential target. As I calmly walked to the front desk, I heard five simultaneous gunshots and my natural reaction was to swiftly collapse my nervous body to the ground—this was a skill that I perfected after living in the hood for eight years. However, I had to remind myself that I wouldn’t get shot as long as I don’t get in the way of fire….I hope. This was a true test of faith!


I approached the front desk and expressed my interest in skeet shooting. The man asked in the most southern accent, “you ever shot a gun before?” I didn’t know if playing DOOM on Windows 95 counted as shooting a gun, so to be safe I said “no.” He gave me these massive bullets and said “wait over there!” I listened because when a man hands you a box of bullets and tells you to do something, you do it! A few minutes later, a different man with a gun in his hand approached me and without making eye contact he said, “follow me.” I wasn’t sure who this guy was, what he wanted or why he wanted me to follow him, but this man had a gun in his hand so I better listen carefully!

My friend and I followed this man into the bushes, not knowing if he wanted to play a good ol’ fashioned game of pin-the-tail-on-the-Geremy–his bullets being the tail, but I stayed brave. Soon, he took my bullets, introduced me to the gun and showed me how to shoot the clay discs.

Disc, meet bullet.  Bullet--Disc.

When I tried to load the first bullet, I accidentally pointed the gun in the instructor’s face, but luckily he was pretty forgiving and he just aimed the gun elsewhere. I guess this happens a lot. My first shot— miss, second shot–miss, third–miss. What was wrong with me?! That’s when he told me–you’re closing the wrong eye! What a rough start! I recovered nicely by hitting 18 out of the 20 discs. I guess all of that practice playing Duck Hunt when I was 7 years old payed off!

When I was done with my ammo I took one of the used shotgun shells to keep in my car so if any ex-convict tries to mess with me, I can show him the shell and say “You see this?! I’m not afraid of going back to jail!!”

Leave a Comment