I don’t like to leave the reader in suspense, so I’ll say it right now—I [accidently] hit him with my car and probably killed him. I’ve had many close calls before, but this time it was unavoidable.
My morning was going great and the weather was nice. There wasn’t much that could’ve been done to make this a better morning. Although I was late to my first class, I entered the campus driving a reasonable speed and carefully went over each of the speed bumps. After the first bump I saw him…or maybe it was a her, I don’t remember.
As I slowly drove in the direction of the parking deck, he slowly walked into the road as if he was playing a game of chicken with me. I quickly slammed brakes to let him pass, but he also stopped to let me pass. I thought, “what a nice guy” and resumed my trip down the road, but then he started walking too. WAIT!! WHAT’S GOING ON?! This guy was on a collision course with death and he wanted me to be the vessel to unite him with God (or the devil).
I don’t like games, so I went for it. I accelerated as fast as I could (which isn’t very fast in a 4-cyl, 175 horsepower car) and tried to beat him across the road. I thought I was in the clear, but then he started running across the road. As I drove, I saw the look of determination in his big brown eyes. He wanted to get across the road now and no one was going to stop him…not even me. All of a sudden, he disappeared. I didn’t see where he went, so I assumed he got across the street safely.
I kept driving and went over one more speed bump, but it was weird because the front wheels mysteriously didn’t pass over the hump. I looked into my rearview mirror to inspect the 1/2 speed bump, but instead I saw HIM. He was quickly rolling left and right in the road, obviously in pain. What did I do?! He kept banging his head on the ground as if he was possessed. His hands…no his feet were quivering in the air and his movements got faster and faster.
I started to go back to help, but what could I do? I reached for my cell phone, but I forgot it at home. I’ve never killed anyone with my car before and felt really guilty for it. I remember the look on his face, I remember waiting for him to pass, I remember trying to be a good Samaritan, but it meant nothing now.
One last look in my rearview mirror confirmed what I thought all along. The squirrel was dead.
P.S: To the people who walked passed and laughed at the epileptic squirrel in the street, have you no shame?!