I was at a desk minding my own business when I heard, â€œIâ€™m bored does anyone have any games?â€ I saw this as an opportunity to add another Uno win to my career, so I took out my deck of Uno cards and asked her if she knew how to play Uno. She responded, â€œyes, you get seven cards and you match the colors and numbers, then I say Uno and win.â€ This explanation was close enough, so I agreed to play with her.
After dealing the cards, she went first. First move: a red 2 card placed over the blue 4. Wait…waitâ€¦thatâ€™s not how you play Uno! I said, â€œwait, you didnâ€™t match the colors or the numbers!â€ She didn’t pay me any mind and without hesitation she put down a red 9. â€œWait, itâ€™s not your turn yet!â€ Instead of waiting for my first card, she searched through her cards and put down a blue 2. The game was suddenly slipping away from me!
I put a blue 6 down on the pile and she followed with a green 2. The game belonged to her at this point and I didnâ€™t know how to recover. Do I compromise the integrity of the game and disregard my morals by quickly putting down five random cards at one time? No way, Geremy, youâ€™re better than that!
I was thinking â€œmorals” and she was thinking â€œvictory.â€ She put a yellow skip on the pile and said â€œUNO!! I WIN, YOU OWE ME A DOLLAR.â€ I said, “I don’t have a dollar.” She said “that’s okay, you can go to the bank.”
Iâ€™d just been hustled. Bamboozled. Swindled. Finessed.
I owe her a dollar.